Off We Go A-Haunting
by Vintage Taylor
Summary: 'Filler' one-shot from When the Sun Rose. With Gohan in college this time around, Goten has lost his trick-or-treating companion. Lucky for him, his dad and grandpa are finally present. He's determined to make their first Halloween the best one yet, and a little help from Trunks couldn't possibly hurt... (Cover art by blauvixen)


**A/N** : This is a little "filler" one-shot from my other story _When the Sun Rose._ If you've never read that and you're new to my trash, hello! All you really need to know is that after a few events, Bardock and Gine live on Earth with the Son family. I had a little chapter in there where they went through the holidays, but I had to leave Halloween out because the chapter was loaded with junk as it was.

SO, with my 21st birthday coming up on the 16th (:D) and Halloween quickly approaching, here is my ridiculous one-shot! Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy! As usual, the goal is to make someone's day!

-Not to be taken too seriously

* * *

 ** _If ever there was a holiday that deserves to be commercialized, it's Halloween. We haven't taken it away from kids. We've just expanded it so that the kid in adults can enjoy it, too._**

 ** _\- Cassandra Peterson_**

* * *

"WHAT!? WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN'T GO!?"

Bardock tensed up over his empty breakfast plate as Goten's voice suddenly became shrill after Gohan had responded to his question. As far as the former time traveling Saiyan knew, they were discussing something called 'Hallow's Eve', or something of that matter. His hands clenched the metal fork so tightly that it began to bend. Vegeta had warned him about the dreaded holidays on Earth, and there were three of them coming up.

"Really!? Another one!?" Chi-Chi snatched the crumbled utensil away from the annoyed father-in-law and huffed. "Savage! Even your son has figured out a way to not destroy the silverware!"

"Yeah," the hero gave his glaring father a smug smile and even lifted his chin a bit for good measure. "I eat everything with my hands!"

"Maybe you can learn how to use chopsticks?" Gine suggested, ignoring the way her husband continued to hunch further over his plate. "It's kind of embarrassing watching you eat rice with a fork, ya know."

The poor grandfather could feel his veins beginning to pulsate on his forehead. As much as he loved these idiots, they drove him up the wall with their constant nagging, bragging...

"YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME, GOHAN! WE GO EVERY YEAR!"

Screaming...

Bardock rubbed his temples as the room grew quiet to listen to the voice coming from the other end. Chi-Chi was already frowning and looking sadly at Goku as if she already knew what was happening.

"I'm sorry, little guy!" Gohan's voice came through, sounding more exhausted than sorry. Everyone but Goten understood how much work he had been putting in for school, but it was hard to tell which one was taking it the hardest. "I have classes from morning til night... It just falls on a terrible day this year. I would miss it if I could, you know I would!"

The child began sniffling, trying his best to understand but not wanting to accept it. "...But Gohan... We've gone trick-or-treating together every year since I could remember! You... You promised nothing was gonna change when you left home..."

Bardock raised an eyebrow as he could hear his eldest grandson comforting the messy-haired hybrid. The grandfather glanced at his son who was reclining back his chair to the point he almost wished the legs would break and he'd fall. "Hey, Kakarot. What the hell is 'tricker treaty?"

Goku snorted, but wasn't sure if it was the terminology or the gruffness of his father's voice that caused him to do it. "Gosh, Dad. You're really getting old, aren't ya!?" the hero caught the glass that was thrown at his head and placed it on the table top with a goofy grin. "It's called 'trick-or-treating. I've never really celebrated it myself, so I dunno exactly what to tell ya. I just know the boys started doing it after I went to Other World for a few years."

Chi-Chi rolled her eyes and plopped herself down on one of the empty seats, still keeping her close-to-sobbing son in her line of vision. "You guys are so lame and were deprived of your childhood, so of course you don't know what trick-or-treating is!" she tapped her freshly painted nails against the table top, watching Goten anxiously but directing her words to the men at the table. "You wear a costume that's either scary or fun, and go door to door asking for candy or other treats, if you're lucky."

"WHAT!?" Goku nearly squealed, causing Bardock to blush in embarrassment and the hero to jump to his feet. He blocked Chi-Chi's view of her increasingly depressed son and placed his large hands on her dainty shoulders. "Why haven't you ever told me about this!? FREE TREATS!?"

Chi-Chi's orbs flickered in feisty way, and Gine knew it meant to step back a good ten feet. She motioned Bardock to follow her, but her husband was too interested in seeing what would happen to their son. "Goku, I've told you about Halloween a million and one times! Whenever October rolled around, you were either in space, training, or DEAD! You made Gohan so focused on those androids that he didn't even care! It wasn't until Goten was born that he actually had a _normal_ childhood!"

Goku gave his wife a blank stare, unsure of how to respond. Well, there was definitely some truth in her statement. But if she ever mentioned free treats and candy, he was absolutely positive he wouldn't let that sort of thing pass by! "Aw... But Chi-Chi..." the good-hearted Saiyan rubbed the back of his neck and glanced over at his son the same time the sniffling boy hung up the phone. The brightest idea he had ever concocted caused his eyes to flash in celebration of his ingenuity. "HEY! Since Gohan is too booked this year, how 'bout I take my little boy Halloweening this year!?"

"You really mean it!?" Chi-Chi and Goten said simultaneously, becoming wreathed in smiles as they glanced at each other and back to the father again. Bardock rolled his eyes, hoping for a good brawl to break out. He pulled himself away from the table and began inching his way towards his wife who was smiling from the sofa in the adjacent living room.

"Yuuuuuuuup!" Goku beamed, and grabbed his father's shoulder as he was passing by. "And your grandpa's comin', too!"

"...WHAT!?"

"Really!?"

"Yuuuuuuuu-"

"Hell no!"

Goku gave his father's arm a sharp pinch when Goten began to pout. In return, he earned a smack to the back of the head. "Ouch..." he released his grip on Bardock and rubbed the sore spot with a frown that matched his young son's. "Okay, okay... I get it. You don't love Goten as much as we thought you did..."

As if on cue, the child shuffled his feet and made a pit stop in front of his grandfather. "Is...that true, Grandpa?"

Bardock looked around in horror as all eyes of his family had that same damn manipulative gleam. He had come to enjoy the gory movies that came on around this time of year, and knew one thing was certain in a situation like this. The good guy was always beaten and murdered. Poor bastard. "...Of course not..." he spoke through gritted teeth and knelt down to give his grandson a weak embrace so he couldn't see him flipping off the father and mother behind him. "But I'm not wearing a costume. You guys gave me a bunch of shit when I was a Great Saiyaman."

"Darn," Chi-Chi snapped her fingers. "I was going to suggest you go as one."

"I have a suggestion," Gine's teasing voice caused a shiver to run down her mate's spine. His grip had tightened on the child, causing him to wheeze. If that woman had a 'suggestion', there was no way in hell it was going to be a good one. "Why not wear a gorilla suit?"

Goku and Chi-Chi began laughing hysterically while Bardock released the gasping Goten. "You hear that, kid? Your grandma is a racist."

"What's a racist?"

"...Nevermind," Bardock blinked. Perhaps it was best to leave the kid completely clueless on that subject. He rose to his feet and looked over his shoulder at his winking wife. With her open eye, she was examining the furry brown tail wrapped around his waist. "Will you ever stop being a pain in the ass?"

"Nope," she giggled and jumped off the sofa. Chi-Chi, now relieved that her son was going to possibly have the best Halloween yet, had already gone into her room to prepare making costumes. Before following her, the lone Saiyan female pinched Bardock's cheek and stuck her tongue out when he slapped her hand away. "Kakarot, when is Halloween, anyway?"

The doofus shrugged. "I dunno-"

"THE THIRTY FIRST!" Chi-Chi screamed from the room. "Tonight!"

* * *

"What the hell are you suppose to be?"

From underneath his large mask, Goku flashed his father the peace sign. "I'm the Great Pumpkin!"

Bardock tilted his head to the side and clicked his tongue. "Nah, you look more like a demented orange." In a sense, the statement rang true. He was wearing his usual orange gi, but donned a rather large jack-o-lantern over his head which was carved to look as scary as Chi-Chi thought possible.

"Well, that's not very nice!" Goku stuck his tongue out at his father from underneath the pumpkin mask but became distracted by the knocking on the door. Bardock rolled his eyes as Goku stumbled and tripped over everything in the living room after trying to see through the tiny eye holes Chi-Chi made. The grandfather sensed a familiar ki and swung the door open to find Trunks wrapped up in toilet paper.

"...And what are you suppose to be? A bathroom accident?"

The son of the prince drew his small, balled up fist back and then struck Bardock right on his torso. The off guard Saiyan coughed a few times until he was able to stand up straight again.

"Damn kid..."

"I'm a mummy, stupid!" the boy grinned, but then his expression faltered as he searched the adult before him. "Didn't Goten say you were taking us?"

Bardock motioned his hand in the air with a 'duh' look on his face. "Yeah, and...?"

"Where the heck is your costume!?"

The two at the doorway heard tiny footsteps come from the far end of the house until a little pirate pushed himself between Bardock's legs until he was in front of his best friend. "How do I look, Trunks!?"

The wrapped up mini Vegeta looked his friend up and down. He was wearing a red skull and crossbones bandanna, a clip-on gold hoop earring, drawn on facial stubble, and of course a stereotypical trench coated, brown booted pirate costume. Trunks gave Goten his nod of approval, and then glowered at Bardock. "Ya see!? You're suppose to be dressed like _that!_ "

"Guess I didn't get the memo, kid," Bardock scoffed and brushed past the boy, patting his head as he went. "You guys go fetch the demented orange man. I'll be waiting out here."

It took the boys a moment to realize the demented orange man was Goku, and hurried inside to help him cut out bigger holes on the jack-o-lantern. Bardock sighed heavily, crossing his arms over his armor-plated chest and looking up at the moonlit sky. Since the morning breakfast, time had past by way too fast. The grumpy grandpa really wasn't ready for this tricker treaty business.

"Ooh, _Bardock_?"

The Saiyan glanced at the doorway to see Gine snaking her way through the grass that desperately needed to be mowed. He shook his head at the sight of her joining in on this ridiculous game, wearing a black witch hat on her head like a trophy. Her hands were behind her back, hiding something. "Whaddya want, pain in my ass?"

Without saying a word, Gine thrusted an orange pumpkin-shaped pail and a furry gorilla mask towards his chest. "Eh, eh, eh! Before you say anything, hear me out. Nobody is going to make you wear this, but just take it in case you decide to stop being a grouch and make your grandson happy."

Bardock bit his bottom lip to avoid fighting with her, not really wanting to go through this all again. Mumbling under his breath, he snatched the hideous mask from her without observing it. "And what's with the bucket? I have to carry it around for the kids' amusement, too?"

"No," Gine smiled sweetly (deceptively is a word that came to Bardock's mind). "I want you to bring me home some sweets."

Her mate turned his nose up and himself away from her. "Not a chance in hell I'm going door to door begging for stale, probably poisoned candy like a drifter. If the kids wanna see me be a gorilla, I'll use some blutz waves."

"I don't think you understand," Gine got up on her tiptoes and pulled his ear close to her lips. Her voice became a soft, sweet whisper. "If you don't bring anything home or make those kids happy, I'll cut your tail off with a butcher's knife. I haven't lost my touch just yet, you know. That monkey's tail is going to be some good protein for tomorrow's soup, huh?"

Somehow, despite his frozen state, Bardock was holding both the mask and the pail as Gine whistled her way back to the house. Yes, he had seen many horror movies this week.

That right there, was the undercover psycho.

* * *

"This should be the last house, kid. Go fill up this damn bucket for your grandma, and we'll head home."

"What!?" Goku, Goten, and Trunks all whined in unison. "But that can't be it! We haven't even be out that long!"

Bardock's eye twitched as yet another sheet-ghost with cut out eye holes bumped into him to run to the door at the end of the pathway. He had been poked in the eye by the scepter of four princesses, threatened to have his brain taken by two zombies, and nearly blasted an old woman for dropping a toothbrush and apple inside the pail instead of candy.

At least, he wasn't the only one in that situation. His son and the kids didn't take it too well.

The grandfather ignored their pouts, although Goku's was hidden underneath the Great Pumpkin, and they all let out groans as they trudged towards the door of what was going to be the last house.

"Come on, guys," Trunks grumbled. "We've got to get the old man home before the news comes on."

"But Trunks, what about the-"

"Shut up!"

The kid looked over his shoulder nervously after punching his friend on the shoulder. Bardock wasn't even paying attention to the trick-or-treaters, rather looking disinterestedly at a smudge on his boots. The Great Pumpkin had run so far in front of them, pushing ahead of the children and their parents to get the good candies first.

"We won't tell them about part two until we get this last candy! I want it to be a surprise!"

"Ohhhh!" Goten nodded, finally understanding. "Do you think it'll make him happy?"

Trunks scoffed after they caught up with Goku to tell the woman at the door the traditional saying. As she dropped the candies into the pails, they said meaningful 'thank yous' and made their way back to the moody Saiyan at the end of the path. "It's Bardock. What do you think?"

"Hey, boys!" Goku snickered underneath his mouth as he eyed his father. "With Pops standing down there, these people don't need any decorations! That face is enough to terrify small children!"

They tried to stifle their laughter once the grandfather glanced in their direction, but Goten was having a hard time holding it in. He showed the now full pail to Bardock before completely breaking down. "Oh my gosh! Grandpa _does_ have a face that frightens small children! I'm so scared right now, I-I could pee!"

"WHAT!?"

"Uh," Goten quickly recovered and pointed a finger at Trunks. "He has a backpack full of secrets!"

"GOTEN!"

"What!?"

Goku lifted the jack-o-lantern off his head to look at the boys in curiosity. It was the first time he had noticed Trunks was wearing a small white backpack behind him, most likely having hidden it inside a capsule upon his arrival to Mount Paozu. "What kind of secrets, Trunks?"

"Yeah," Bardock raised an eyebrow. "What kind of secrets, kid?"

The mummy glared at Goten as he threw the bag onto the pavement. "Nice going, Long John Silver. I wanted to surprise you guys, but..." Trunks smirked as he unzipped the backpack. He pulled open the flaps to reveal rolls and rolls of toilet paper and cans of spray paint. He flashed his eyes up at the group. "It's time for Halloween: Part Two!"

"Says who?" Bardock pressed, glaring at the items in the bag. "And what the hell is all this shit for? You need to use the bathroom? Repair your costume?"

"Yeah," Goku placed his pumpkin head on the ground and scratched the back of his head in confusion. "I didn't know this Halloween stuff had a part two."

 _No offense, but what you don't know could fill a warehouse._ Trunks deadpanned and pulled out a roll of toilet paper. The cool chill of an October night blue a single piece of his costume away while a bat was screeching for a moment in the distance. "You can't possibly believe the most coolest part of Halloween is the candy," the mischievous boy snicked under his breath while proudly holding up the roll. "...When you've got _this_! You see, you go to the houses with the largest tree and start decorating it with the toilet paper until you've created a masterpiece! It's the best feeling in the world!"

Goku frowned at the mad scientist laughter coming from the mummy. "But Trunks... Are you sure that's right? Doesn't toilet paper belong in the bathroom? Won't people get mad?"

"Nope! It's against Halloween law! The law states that on this special night, everyone must accept the fact that their houses are going to get TP'd and laugh it off! Come on, it's the law of the land! Are you..." Trunks narrowed his eyes on Goku as the hero straightened up. "...Disobeying the law? Maybe I should sic Krillin on you, him being the chief of police now and all..."

The Great Pumpkin fell onto his knees and put his hands into a prayer formation. "No, no, no! I'm a good citizen! It's just a bit new to me is all!"

"Mmhm!" Trunks nodded smugly, and handed each member of his little gang three rolls of jumbo toilet paper. When he got to Bardock, he pointed at the mask in his right hand before handing him his supplies. "You're gonna have to wear that, dude. If we somehow get on the news, you want your identity to be protected."

"Kid, we're faster than any helicopter, car, boat, what have you. There's no reason to be 'protected'."

Trunks grumbled under his breath and punched Goten's arm. The pirate cleared his throat, barely remembering his lines in case a situation like this happened. "But Grandpa... You know how upset Mom and Grandma will be if they see your face on the news or find reports on our yard or-"

The kids stopped when they heard the cursing escaping Bardock's lips as he struggled to fit his hair and head into the mask. When he had succeeded, Goku busted out laughing while keeping one hand on his stomach and the other pointing a mocking finger at his father. "I have to say Dad, it really _suits_ you!"

"...Just shut the hell up, Kakarot!" Bardock was crimson underneath the gorilla mask and snatched the toilet paper away from Trunks. Despite having to wear this damned thing, Halloween: Part Two was already looking better than Part One. "Let's meet on the top of that mountain over there when we run out, and I don't want to see you little shits being followed. Got it?"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Trunks rolled his eyes. "We hear you loud and clear, King Kong."

It took less than five minutes in total for the Saiyan tricksters to decorate the first city with toilet paper. Goku became a little confused when he heard someone firing a shotgun at him, and shook his head knowing that the Halloween police were going to have their handful taking care of the spoiled sports. Goten was the first to run out of supplies, having vandalized a tree in the woods that belonged to nobody. He waited impatiently on the mountain top until the rest of his team appeared at last.

"Tell me you brought more!" the child whined to the mummy. If anything, he could knock Trunks out and use his costume for the activities...

"Keep your earring on!" Trunks pulled out a capsule from seemingly nowhere and threw it on the ground. After the smoke had cleared, Goku and Goten nearly squealed at the sight of all the rolls laying before them in a perfect stack. "I told you guys, I'm always prepared!"

Without hesitation, the Son boys snatched the rolls and disappeared. Bardock's smirk was covered by his mask, watching as his son and grandson cheered loudly before separating. Trunks raised a lavender eyebrow that was covered with white tape. "Ya know, if I wasn't so sure you were... well, you. I would think you're having a good time."

"...Shut up, kid."

* * *

"That was... That was... " Bardock panted as he pressed his back even more so against the wall. Once a brutal member of the PTO, he knew a lot about terrified faces. Except this time around, it was completely harmless and just for the sheer joy of... Halloween merriment with the kids. "That was sort of thrilling, wasn't it? Did you fucking see that guy's face when the ghosts exploded!? Freakin' priceless!"

After TP-ing the entire South and North cities, the terrible four had come across a large farmland. Of course, Halloween would be nothing without ghosts. Gotenks had to be brought out to perform his Super Ghost Kamikaze attack, and those little devils tipped over all the cows while the tricksters couldn't hold in their laughter anymore. A farmer had come out with his shotgun to scare away whatever was bothering his precious animals, but the ghosts beat him to the punch. After they exploded, the scream from the farmer was too much for Bardock who was getting an ab workout from all of this.

Krillin had eventually caught up to the troublemakers, unsure of their true identity until he caught the Great Pumpkin doing Instant Transmission. Goku had somehow brought them to an alley way due to sensing Gohan nearby, but it turned out to be the perfect place for the next attack.

Trunks and Goten grinned at each other for being able to get away with all this. If Gohan had taken them like he did the previous years, he would have used his _morals_ and _ethics_ to stop them. "Now, for the coup de grâce! Spray paint!"

From underneath the gorilla mask, Bardock raised an eyebrow at the yellow can being offered to him. "What the hell do I do with it?"

"You've got to shake it like this," Trunks grunted while he spoke as he shook the small can with all his might. Once he was satisfied, he handed the cooled spray paint over to the monkey man and pointed to the button. "Now you aim the front at the wall, press the button, and start writing!"

Bardock blinked at his blank, grimy, probably hobo-and-kitten pissed canvas. "...What do I write?"

"What a minute, guys!" the Great Pumpkin's lecturing voice came out yet again, and the kids narrowed their eyes. "I think I've heard about this before somewhere... Isn't this, uh, whatcha call it... Vandalism?"

"Ah, but _Uncle_ Goku!" Bardock raised an eyebrow as Trunks put on the innocent charm. "If it were illegal, we wouldn't be doing it! Everyone knows that!"

The pumpkin tapped his fingers where his jaw should be and nodded. "Alright, I see your point! Write away, Dad!"

"Kakarot, you're so clueless sometimes..." Bardock shook his head and aimed the can at the wall. "Hey, kid. Just tell me what to write, I don't have time for this."

Trunks rolled his eyes. His father always told him Bardock and Goku were a little on the illiterate side. "I dunno! Something cool! Like... Ooh! I got it! How about 'Saiyans' but with a 'Z'!?"

"Yeah! Z's make everything cooler!" Goten chimed in at last while Goku simply shrugged. If the kids thought it was cool, it must be so.

"...Alright..." Bardock turned red behind the mask, thankful that he was covered. He pressed down on the button and watched as yellow liquid seeped through until it came out as hairspray onto the wall. He began to sweat as he tried spelling on the word in his mind, while remembering to add a Z somewhere in the mixture. The can was empty when he was done, but he continued to hold it. "There. All done."

Trunks nearly fell over after Bardock stepped back to reveal his masterpiece. "You dummy! What the heck is a 'Zsaiyansz'!? You're suppose to add one Z at the end! S-A-I-Y-A-N-Z!"

"WELL, YOU NEVER TOLD ME WHERE TO PUT THE Z!" the gorilla shot back, raising his can in the air as if he were about to beat him with it. Trunks raised his hands in the air to calm the angered primate down.

"Alright, alright, fine. I guess we can leave it at that. Next city we go to, it's my turn and I'll do it right!" Trunks raised a finger to silence the protesting Goten, only to get bitten by the pirate.

"I've been trying to tell you guys to look at that sign right there!" Redbeard pouted, and pointed at the words on the side of the building next to the alley. Bardock stared through the small slits of his mask, trying to make it out.

"Satan...City...University?"

"Mmhm!" Goten beamed proudly, and placed his hands on his hips. "We're at Gohan's school! I guess we sorta are celebrating Halloween together...At least near each other!"

Goku smiled and placed a hand on his son's bandanna covered head. "Yeah, and I bet he's really happy knowing you're smiling that big!" the Zsaiyan's laugh was muffled due to the jack-o-lantern. Once it had ceased, he removed his hand and nervously fiddled his thumbs together. "I just hope that... you didn't mind spending it with your old man this time around."

Goten looked up at his father with eyes sparkling as if he had just received the greatest present in the world. He wrapped his little arms around the legs of the tall Goku where he could reach and smiled brighter than the moon. "Are you kidding!? This has been the most awesomest, coolest, most bestest thing that could ever happen to me! I've got my grandpa and my dad joining my bestest friend and me on Halloween! I would have never thought this would happen if you asked me a few months ago!"

Bardock gave a small smile as he watched the two interacting. It had been a long time coming. "Calm down, kid. You're speaking too fast."

"I'm sorry!" he laughed, still not taking his eyes of his dad. "It's just... I'm so happy!"

Goku grinned after knowing he heard that statement before from another certain hybrid and lifted his son off the ground. "And we're gonna do this every year!"

Trunks joined in on the cheer coming from the father-son duo, but Bardock hushed them all when they heard voices drawing nearer. "Could be campus security," he whispered. "Why don't we get out of here?"

"Wait a minute," the boy whispered back, but not missing a trace of mischief in his voice. "It could be a bunch of nerds. Why don't you chuck the can at the first person that walks by here!?"

"Isn't that a little mean?" Goku questioned as Trunks waved him off.

"No, no, no! They're all in on this! It's against Halloween law to get mad at the pranks of others," the mummy shrugged. "And if they disobey the law, you can just use instant transmission to get us out of here."

The hero thought for a minute until he nodded. "Well, alright! You haven't been wrong yet!"

As soon as the first figure appeared at the entrance of the alley, Bardock didn't think twice about it. He drew his hand back while tightly clenching the can. He let out a quiet, yet dark chuckle before hurling it towards the victim.

"OW! What the heck!?"

"Oh shit, it's Gohan! Let's go!"

Gohan rubbed the sore spot on the back of his head as Videl bent down to pick up the books he had dropped. The young adults blinked as costumed group of four connected with each other. The pumpkin head had pressed two fingers where his forehead should be.

"Was that...?"

"Yes," Gohan took the books from his girlfriend and shook his head. Despite the darkness of the alley and the faces hidden behind the masks, he knew they were smiling and laughing a sound that hadn't been heard in months. A smile slowly found its way to him as the momentary pain from the spray can faded away. Using his free arm, he wrapped it around Videl and pulled her close. "...But I'm thinking the Great Saiyamen should put a stop to this after their last class before it gets out of hand."

"Oh, definitely."


End file.
